


Christams Auction

by kokode



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Author's stupidity, M/M, lots and lots of stupidity, yep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-10
Updated: 2014-02-10
Packaged: 2018-01-11 20:01:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1177324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kokode/pseuds/kokode
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kise’s manager makes a last-minute damage control. Kagami and Aomine face the consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christams Auction

**Author's Note:**

> Note: OOC Kuroko (I think). Kise is a kicked puppy who easily wags his tail at the sign of a treat. Kagamin being manhandled too much. Beyond pissed Aomine.

"This is not the model Kise Ryouta that I know! Now tell me what the heck is wrong or I swear to God I will send you to the States and drown you in so much work the only break you’ll have is for eating and sleeping!"

A really angry Fujisaki Masato was waving several photographs in front of his ward. The man was clearly unsatisfied with the model’s work for him to be this angry and to even go as far as to threaten the blond.

"uwaaa~ Fujisakicchi, surely you wouldn’t dare…!"

"Oh stop that ‘-cchi’ shit. I’m not in the mood to deal with your playfulness right now. And believe me, I WOULD.”

Seeing how serious his manager really was, Kise had no other choice but to spill everything that has been bothering him throughout the whole shoot.

oOoOoOoOoOoOo

_FWEEEEEEEEEEEET!_

"Alright, that’s enough! Take a 15-minute break then come back for the last part of the practice. I DO NOT want to hear any objections from you guys. Are we clear?"

_bzzt bzzt_ _bzzt bzzt_

"I said, are we clear?"

"Yes, Coach."

_bzzt bzzt_ _bzzt bzzt_

"I can’t hear you!"

"YES, COACH!"

"Good. Now—"

_bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt_

“ _Sigh._  Fine. You may go. But be sure to come back after 15 minutes! And answer that damn phone already!”

The Seirin High Basketball team slunk over to the benches to fetch their towels and drink from their jags. Learning from previous experiences (let’s just say being late for the next part of the practice may result to one’s death), they all agreed to just put their things to one side of the gym for their own safety.

The phone from earlier was still buzzing until Kuroko decided to just answer it rather than face the coach’s crabhold. He went out after excusing himself and didn’t come back until a few seconds before the coach called them for the last part of their practice.

"I’m sorry, Coach, but can you please excuse Kagami-kun and I for the last part? It’s only for today, something came up and I really need to go and deal with it immediately."

"Oh well, if it really can’t be helped then it’s okay to make an exception for you, Kuroko. (EH?! Why only him?) Shut up Koganei, it’s Kuroko we’re talking about here. I’m sure if he said it’s something he has to deal with himself it’s pretty serious matter. Am I right, Kuroko?"

"Yes, it is a serious matter, Coach."

"See? Although I can’t understand why you would need Kagami to go with you. Can’t you do it alone?"

"Yeah, I wanna ask too. Whaddaya need me for Kuroko?"

"Ah, the matter at hand is pretty serious Coach, Kagami-kun. It is a matter of life and death and it is important that I take Kagami-kun with me. Please Coach, there’s not much time."

"Oh, sounds like you really are in a pinch. Tch. Nothing I can do, then. Alright, Kuroko, Kagami, you’re excused for today, but don’t think I’ll let you two off easy. Be ready to get twice your usual regime on the next practice. Now scram before I change my mind."

"Uwah! Why also me? It’s only Kuroko who ma—-oomph!"

"Yes, Coach, we understand. ("Kuroko, you bastard! That fucking hurt! Argh!") Thank you. We’ll be going now. Kagami-kun let’s go."

"Alright, take care you two."

The golden duo left their school — well Kuroko did as he dragged Kagami by the shirt — after they collected their stuff and went to Kagami’s apartment. Kuroko ordered Kagami to get cleaned up first before getting a shower himself then he made the redhead wear some casual clothes and they were off again, the shorter male saying that they’ll be going to the park and meeting someone there.

Kagami wanted to ask Kuroko what this “matter of life and death” is and why he needed to be dragged into it too. Not that he wouldn’t cover for his bestfriend if the matter turns out to be pretty dangerous. He just thought that it might help their case some if Kuroko told him even a little bit of what is going on.

When they arrived, Kagami noticed the overly crowded area in front of this make-up stage Kuroko dragged him behind. The shorter male then left Kagami and went over to an important looking guy and conversed with him for a while then went back to Kagami’s side.

Soon after Kagami saw the important looking guy lagging someone behind him who he recognized as Kuroko’s avid suitor, Kise Ryouta. The usual chipper look the blond normally sports is replaced by this sullen and sulky look that makes him look even more like a child than usual. When he noticed the two Seirin players though his demeanor visibly changed and he now looks like some puppy who’s about to be handed his favorite snack.

"Oi Kuroko, what is Kise doing here? More importantly, what are WE doing here? Where is this ‘matter of life and death’ you’re talking about? I can’t sense any danger nearby… were you just pulling our legs back there?"

Once they’re close enough, Kuroko grabbed Kagami’s arm and manhandled him (“Hey! Ow, that hurt!”) towards the important looking guy as the other gave Kise to Kuroko. To Kagami it looked like they were trading goods (which really isn’t too far from what is happening and going to happen, but the redhead doesn’t need to know that.)

"I’ll be leaving Kagami-kun in your care, then, Fujisaki-san."

"Wha-? Oi Kuroko what’s the meaning if this? Answer my questions, damn it!"

"Kagami-kun, please calm down. The matter of life and death I was talking about at practice earlier is this."

"What ‘this’? You just exchanged me for Kise with this guy. I don’t see where the danger is, except.. *gasp* Kuroko you didn’t sell me did you? You bastard, if you were short on money I’d have lent you some! No need to sell your bestfriend to some unknown people! Oi Kuroko!"

“ _Sigh._  Like I said, you need to calm down Kagami-kun. What I meant earlier is that I needed you to trade for the reason that I breathe and if I didn’t do that I’d be spending Christmas alone which would lead to my depression and then to thoughts of suicide. You wouldn’t want that to happen right?

So here we are. I’m trading you for ‘my life’ which, if you hadn’t already figured out, is Kise-kun (Wah! Kurokocchi I love you, too!) because I’d die if some other person gets to claim him as theirs before I even do.

That’s why I’m sorry about this Kagami-kun. Please take care. Also, don’t worry too much. I called Aomine-kun over to save you. Let’s just hope that he brought enough money with him. We’ll be taking our leave now. Farewell.”

"Ah! Thank you Kagamicchi! Now I can spend my Christmas with Kurokocchi and good luck at the Auction! I hope Aominecchi gets to buy you.."

Kise’s voice faded gradually as he was dragged away (the light blue-haired phantom sixth man seems to love dragging anyone and everyone after him) from the place. Wait.. what did Kise say? Auction?! So Kuroko did sell him! The bastard—!

Kagami wasn’t able to get a single word in after that as he was turned over immediately to some people who put light make-up on his face (which itches but he didn’t dare scratch again for fear of having his hands cut off, or at least that was what the make-up arist threatened him with. He can’t be sure if it really was just a bluff, now can he?) After taking off his shirt and making him put on some stylish clothes, they gave him back to the important looking guy — Fujisaki-san (as Kuroko addressed him) — who then brought him near the entrance to the stage.

"Alright Kagami-kun, all you have to do is stand there and not act violently whatever it is the host might say. Do this and you won’t have a probem with me or your friend, Kuroko-kun. You understand, don’t you?"

Despite the smile Fujisaki-san gave him, Kagami can feel the dangerous aura oozing from the manager and nodding his head in affirmation was about all he could do for fear of facing the man’s wrath. Goddamn shorty and his acquaintances. Why the hell do they all have to be scary creeps who might do unthinkable things to you if you ever had the misfortune of contacting their bad side? Argh! And what the hell did he drag me into an that thing with Aomine and bringing enough money? What the hell was Kuroko thinking?

The redhead was too absorbed in his own thoughts that he didn’t hear what the host just said as he came on stage. What did bring him back to his conscious were the loud, annoying shrieks from the audience who looked like they were gonna gobble him up whole given the chance. It’s all he can do not to shiver in absolute horror as he swept his eyes over the masses in search of his boyfriend (who Kuroko promised would be there).

It didn’t take him long to spot the bluenette as he easily towered over the people gathering around the area. He was about to wave when Fujisaki-san cleared his throat and looked at him, a silent warning of some sort that Kagami didn’t bother to decipher coz he knows it is something that will put him in danger.

Sensing someone staring at him, he turned to look at his boyfriend who looked as if he’s ready to kill anyone anytime. Sending the bluenette a pleading look (which Kagami hoped the other interpreted correctly) before finally paying attention to the host, Kagami almost fell out of the stage when he heard what exactly Kuroko signed him up on.

"Alright everyone! Now that I’ve dished out this hunk’s statistics and abilities, let’s get on with the bidding!"

"What the ever loving fuck?!" was all Kagami thought as the people — both male and female — started the bidding. He cursed his best friend in his head again for putting him in this (scary ass) predicament as he wished to any and all deity listening to  _please, please, PLEASE, let Aomine have enough money to buy him out of this or heaven knows what the bluenette might do to Kise (or Kuroko) otherwise_.

**Author's Note:**

> Note: This was a gift for tumblr user steelette during the knb secret santa thing wwwwww I never did find the time to edit it and post it on my accounts... so yeah...


End file.
